Hi, friends. I have debated for a while about posting something. I mean, I suddenly have free time to write. However, I question my ability to write anything meaningful in this particular moment in history. Nonetheless, here I go…

First of all, how are you doing?

Okay? How are you really doing?

Amidst constant reports and updates from national, state, and local leaders, combined with well intentioned but poorly delivered reports from the rest of us on social media, it’s not hard to imagine that our collective and individual spirits are a bit damaged. The best I can come up with right now is that “it is okay to not be okay.” (Yes, that is as cliche’ as it comes, but it’s accurate.)

Second of all, by a show of hands, how many of us are scared, confused, tired, worried, pissed, frustrated, angry, heartbroken, sick (literally and/or figuratively), depressed, anxious, etc?

Yeah, me too. My emotions are up and down like an old dude with a bad case of hemorrhoids. As a fire department captain, I get constant status reports. Some of them are encouraging, others are discour…they suck! Sometimes I feel like we are doing very well given our circumstances, and other times it seems we are more like the proverbial monkey, um, having relations with a football. I find hope in seeing the sacrifices that so many in the service and healthcare industries are making, and I feel extreme anger and hopelessness in seeing the response of many who seem to place their own selfishness in higher regard than others. In essence, it feels like being served a shi feces sandwich…that occasionally is adorned with jelly!

In the middle of all this, I fight to find perspective–yet it is hard to find circumstances that are relatable. Our modern world has never experienced something exactly like this. Thus, looking back into history to find encouragement on how we have endured such a state of affairs often leaves me lacking. Even still, there is perspective to be found.

Have y’all heard of Brené Brown? (Please forgive my southern drawl, there.) I love her. If you are not familiar, she is the guru of vulnerability and living/thriving in the midst of awkwardness and uncertainty. Recently, Brené started a podcast, and I listened to her first episode last night. I was at work, it was late at night, the crew had already laid down for some rest. I sat in my chair, reflecting on the day, and was feeling a bit anxious about everything. (And at the same time, I must say that I was thinking about how blessed I am to be working around such motivated, selfless people.) This was when I ran across the podcast. As I listened, I began to feel a little better about things. I quickly gained much needed perspective.

In this first episode, Brené discusses “FFTs”. I encourage you to listen to the podcast for yourself, but let me give you my brief takeaway…my perspective.

FFTs stands for F-ing First Times. (Sort of has a ring to it, no?) 😉 These are the moments we all face, from “minor” to “global pandemic”, for the very first time. The moments are fraught with uncertainty, awkwardness, and a certain level of fear. All-the-while, we are often forced to make decisions with limited (and/or constantly evolving) information. This is a super uncomfortable place to be, and yet it is a constant of life. It is where we grow. It is where our humanity is elevated. It is where we get to make a choice: to succumb or succeed.

Obviously, all of us are facing a HUGE FFT moment right now. And I would guess for most of us, it is larger than any other FFT in our lives. For me, the needed perspective I gained here was that first time “anythings” are difficult, but first time pandemics are F-ing scary!! It is natural to be overwhelmed. We are not supposed to be okay with all of this. However, we can, and must step forward into our fear. In fact, it is currently the only way to step forward at all.

All of this to say, I am with you, friends. I, too, am worried…but hopeful. This crisis does have an ending point, even if we cannot yet see it.

I’d love to hear your feedback, friends. Even more, I’d love this to be the beginning of a conversation where we share each other’s burdens, and encourage each other to step into our fears!

You can start a conversation by replying below.

Be well, and stay healthy…

P.S. If you have a story to tell and would like to join Jim Ladiski Writes as a guest blogger, please contact me!